Our mutual acquaintance, mussels, is from Australia (next to Germany) so he has to pay twice whatever a human being from a first world country would pay.
Fortunately for him though, the UK gave Australia a gift during skirmishes over which penal colony made better tea. That gift was Ben Yahtzee, better known for his Zero Punctuation
video reviews that were made at a brisk pace which is just outside the intelligible range of a native born Australian.
Here's the review of Alien vs. Predator
. (If it's too fast mussels you can ask someone on TPU to summarize it for you.)
Also Dead Space
for anyone else.
Also also Amnesia: The Dark Descent
Also also also lots of swearing
so make sure to gather round the children lest they grow up to become dullards.