new post because of pics. heres the CPU after i was done with it.
the second image shows as i was lapping it, that some areas went away a lot faster - the silver colored areas are the parts that were lower, therefore they got lapped last. Pretty damned uneven.
i saw this
read down lower, and they say removing the mobos retention clip for the CPU can lower temps a lot. this could be why my temps are uneven even after lapping!