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Steam Skyrim Contest !!

Discussion in 'Games' started by Kreij, Nov 8, 2011.

  1. qubit

    qubit Overclocked quantum bit

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    @Mussels

    You've done it again - work of genius! :respect: :toast:
     
  2. Delta6326

    Delta6326

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    Well I know I wasn't going to win, but I just wanted to say that I broke down and went to gamestop got the game for $15.
     
  3. jasper1605

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    It was the best of games; it was the worst of games.

    Welcome to Rookgard of the prominent world of Astera! Here is your torch now go kill rats with your bare hands and bring me their bodies so I may worshi... wash them and make them into jackets... yes jackets.

    And so began my questing of killing rats in hopes of ascertaining the coveted level 2. Wait! Look! A level 7 and he wants to teach me how to play. Intrigued, I leave the safety of Rookgard walls into the wild that even Jake Sulley would have cringed at after being in pandora.

    EEK spiders are attacking and I only have a torch that does.... 0 damage! Oh no I'm poisoned now! Level 7 character, give me some antidotes please! Level 7? Where are you? The darkness begins to set in; I've been betrayed. My first friend used me as bait against the spiders... To quote Sheldon Cooper from Big Bang Theory, "Why have thou forsaken me God whom I deny the existence of?!"

    Suddenly my knight in shining level 7 armor reappears; I'm saved! Only this time he has a dark demeanor about his 2d bird's eye view character. "Pay me and I'll heal you," he states. "But I have no money to pay you, only the gratitude in my heart." Callously, he walks away without saying a word; leaving me to the cold, lonely fate of dying at the hands of spider poison. Lost and far away from my loved ones in town, I embrace the fact that I will be losing 40% of all of my experience gained by slaying rats in a cellar. I lay down, and let life slip away from me...

    I am reborn! with no money, torch or experience I vow to never trust another person ever again and stay in a cellar killing rats with my bare hands until I reach the level to escape Rookgard and venture into the main continent of Astera: level 8. After weeks of training, I have attained it and leave the peasant noobs behind being betrayed by that same level 7.

    In Astera I am welcomed to a group of level 120 knights who say they'll teach me how to play the main continent. Excited about my level 8 achievement I forget my one solemn oath of never trusting. I was led to a den of spiders, but I was armed with sword and shield and slayed them all. The knights leave my screen but before the third one fades from view he leaves me with a :) and vanishes. My battle icon comes up; another spider. Piece of cake. Only this time, it was a giant spider; it one hit killed me: the once proud Randomoxide was killed again by a member of the spider family.

    Enraged, my keyboard was split in half by the energy flowing from my body, the screen begins to melt from the heat emanating my once calm face and windows crack from the valkyrie shrieks coming from my throat.

    2 and a half years later and approximately 6,000 hours I am a level 52 mage. My task? press F12 every 22.5 minutes then hold the control key and click 3 hams. I was the runeweaver of my guild. Oh no! I'm out of meat; I shall go hunt for meat. Elephants are good sources, I drop to the level where they are and all of the sudden my character freezes in time paralyzed by fear of such a raging beast not wanting to give me 2 meats from its corpse. I try to move but no response: the window closes. Randomoxide was trapped in an interdimensional rift between Tibia's servers and my ISP's beyond sub-par internet connection. I could have mailed the data back and forth faster than Time Warner was sending it. By the time Time Warner decides to give me internet again, Randomoxide was trampled by the elephants, my body looted and I was demoted to level 48.


    Tibia in and of itself was the worst game I've ever played simply because I spent so much time to lose so much each time a mistake was made. It was the best game I ever played because it was so addicting I could sit for hours on end just pressing F12 to make another batch of Sudden Death runes to sell to acquire my Boots of Haste (only to have them looted when I died). What are the results of my work? A broken keyboard, whole months of my life gone (at least shared the acct with a friend haha) and my character has since been cleared from the servers just like Arnold Schwarzenegger would 'Erase' someone.
     
    Irony says thanks.
  4. andrisk1 New Member

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    Deal or No Deal's recreation for PC.
    Actually I played 2 versions of it, one that is so bad, it is a DVD, but game for pc is atrocious. Its highest resolution was 800x600 to start with. If you have watched deal or no deal, and know how Howie Mandel looks with his signature soul patch, well in game it is pixelated beyond recognition. :shadedshu The only thing entertaining maybe once in a blue moon for like family night is the multiplayer. You can either play hotseat, or just one game per person. The best thing about it is making fun of it.
    I just thought it would be nice to share thism so nobody gets the game.

    [​IMG]

    I know its an IGN picture, but it fits everything about the game.
    If my very slim chance of winning actually happens, my steam account is andrisk1
     
  5. Darkleoco

    Darkleoco

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    Not an entry but nice to see people doing things like this :) :toast:
     
  6. Irony

    Irony

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    Okay, it came out yesterday. You can gift it to me anytime.

    jk :D
     
    More than 25k PPD
  7. xBruce88x

    xBruce88x

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    hmm... well the worst games i've played... anything that has to do with Zynga. Seriously... every game seems to play the exact same. It starts off as just you playing... then you get the feel for the game and realize its kinda easy and fun... then you look over and see you have to buy credits to really progress... and on top of that you pretty much have to con others into playing just so you can advance in the game... Oh, and lets not forget, if you're not logged in at a certian time in some of their games, you miss out on exp. So seriously... f**k Zynga. its all a giant money making scam with pretty graphics. And worst of all... their games are starting to spread onto mobile.

    Mussels's game is 100x better than anything Zynga can come up with.
     
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  8. qubit

    qubit Overclocked quantum bit

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    The worst game is Battlefield 3. Clearly.

    Why? Well, because of MW3, even more clearly. MW3 sold more, waay more, so it therefore has to be better. There is no other reason for people to buy it.

    I mean, BF3 has all these gremlins and issues with multiplayer and single player, while MW3 just works. If you want to know what that's like, it's very similar to owning one of those superior Apple computers, which just work too.

    So there you have it: BF3 shit, MW3 awesome. :rockout:

    Oh and I haven't played BF3. I just know.
     
    Last edited: Nov 19, 2011
  9. ChristTheGreat

    ChristTheGreat

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    The worst game I ever played on PC, is Doom 3.

    For a 2004 game, it wasn't bad Graphical, but there was a few things I didn't like. Seriously, come on, you are in 2145, you can go on other planet, like Mars where you are, but you can't take your dumb flashlight with any gun? You didn't thought to put it on your gun, on your head or mouth? or use damn tape to put in somewhere lol... Anyone in the army, I am sure when they are in dark place, they have a flashlight that they can use on their gun.

    Most of the time in the game, you open a door, and wow Scary monster.. After you open a door, woaaa Scary monster.

    Far Cry and Half-life 2 were WAYYYY better...

    There might be game that could be worst than this one, but it is the one I played that is the worst.
     
    Crunching for Team TPU
  10. Irony

    Irony

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    You should be banned for that, you worshipper of Steve jobs. :shadedshu
     
    qubit says thanks.
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  11. Solaris17

    Solaris17 Creator Solaris Utility DVD

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    waiting for the answer is MURDER I want this game! I have to play it on other peoples PC's
     
  12. Marineborn

    Marineborn New Member

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    that made me smile, thats extremly strong sarcasm threw text, most impressive
     
    qubit says thanks.
  13. qubit

    qubit Overclocked quantum bit

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    No! No! No! I really meant it! :laugh:

    Thanks dude. :toast:
     
  14. yogurt_21

    yogurt_21

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    if you're doing it that way just setup an rdp protocol on someone's machine that has and can run the game then wait for them to go to work. Sounds fool proof to me. lol


    4 more days, not many new entries, wonder is most people bought the game already?
     
  15. Wrigleyvillain

    Wrigleyvillain PTFO or GTFO

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    Yeah...he had me until the tired and cheap shot dig at Macs.

    Want a fucking news flash? Apple computers do just work. I won't speak of iOS (as a walled garden had better "work"). I'm not even comparing them to Windows at all when I say that, for the record. Take it from someone who makes his damn living supporting them (and knows his way around a PC too obviously) and has for a long time.

    You know, Qubit, more than anything I just wish you were acted little more professional in your new "position".
     
  16. crazyeyesreaper

    crazyeyesreaper Chief Broken Rig

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    yea i bought the game but if i win i would gift it to a friend so he can enjoy it as well, :toast:
     
  17. qubit

    qubit Overclocked quantum bit

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    I was doing satire my man, as marineborn figured out - it wasn't supposed to be a "realistic" comparison, but properly over the top ridiculousness to make my readers laugh, as per the competition rules. :)

    It looks like my "cheap shot" at Macs really hit the spot. ;)

    Now come on, let's see you trash a game and win this competition! :toast:
     
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2011
    wolf and Irony say thanks.
  18. Sihastru

    Sihastru

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    Worst game I ever played: MW3.
    Rant: M'eh.
     
  19. MasterCormic New Member

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    Rage-Bethesda Softworks

    Rage, what kind of impression does it leave on me? PURE RAGE. Wow, just to play it, well, with playable visuals you would need to constantly scour the internet for graphics drivers fixes and small tweaks which could take hours if not days to perfect, and after all that it doesnt even run how it should, LAG LAG LAG, even those guys with GTX 580s. So much hype, "OMG wow a new fallout-like game, BUY BUY BUY" but then BaMMM!:banghead:, it smacks you in the face with a console ported piece of crap. Well, that's all I gotta say.

    Good luck! to everyone that entered.:rockout:

    Steam: mastercormic
     
  20. Kreij

    Kreij Senior Monkey Moderator Staff Member

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    Just a reminder that tomorrow is the last day to enter this contest for anyone who would like to do so. :toast:
     
    qubit says thanks.
  21. qubit

    qubit Overclocked quantum bit

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    Thankyou, I've been meaning to incoherently trash another game and cruise to an easy victory. :laugh:
     
  22. theubersmurf

    theubersmurf

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    The day draws near...while we greedily await his judgement. Dammit.
     
  23. tigger

    tigger I'm the only one

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    The worst game is, does this cloth smell of chloroform, it dont make them unconscious fast enough........Oh its pc games.....This is nothing disregard it.

    My worst game on the pc is Doom3,

    Its like they knew all you can see is a little white circle of light from the torch, so they knew it would be easier to run because of that. You run around and you cant see feck all, i understand they wanted it dark but that was just a bit over the top.
     
  24. damric

    damric

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    Everquest

    The original Everquest. My fellow employees and my best friend were raving about this game and how addicting it was, so I went over to his house to try it out. I remember the god-awful blocky avatars and other crap graphics. I went outside town to find some rats or something to kill but I never made it because I was bored of this game after 10 minutes, 5 of which was making my character. From that point on, I could never stomach myself to play another fantasy MMORPG, because to me they all look like copies of that original stupid Everquest game. Thanks EQ, you ruined it. :mad:
     
  25. Cold Storm

    Cold Storm Battosai

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    All right, I might get some flack over this.

    Crysis

    I went and bought the game over the huge hype that is "super powered suit", that gives you the power of a super human. Due to that, I became one of the mass lambs... Buying over the gimmick that this game was going to be great.. What I failed to see, due to the masses prizing it, was that it's only fun at the start.. Why? You get all the powers at the start, then you lose it.. Yes, it gives you a story. It gives you reason to play. But, to some, like myself, it gives you reason to not play anymore.. Why didn't I want to play anymore once this terrible thing happened, and "things" came down to tear this world apart?

    To me, the start just gives me the only reason to play the game. You got all the powers, you got everything to just mess around. 45m to play, and I'm good to go.. Running real fast, jumping over things and destroying it by the fall.. What more do you want? Shooting? It's got it. Even camo that allows that sneak up and one hit wonders.. To me, it gave me no reason to play it when the "sh1t hit the fan" and you lose it all..

    It was the worst game I ever played due to the factor I spent so much on it and just wanted to play 45m of it.. I didn't want to do anymore and now, it's stilling in a drawer that I'll never want to open again.


    Oh, and did I mention... It's the worst meme that came from gaming.. "can Crysis play it?" It makes me report the post over and over again.. TPU should have a 2d ban for anyone that says that when a video card comes out.. IMHO
     
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