Discussion in 'Games' started by Kreij, Sep 20, 2012.
BTW, I hope I can "enter" this contest without actually entering
Dammit. This just does not sit well with me at all.
So many TPU'ers have been there for me when I needed it from other countries.
US (addressed) prize still stands.
Separate, additional prize for international entries and I'll work out the details with the winner.
All other requirements the same.
To dear pirates :
Hope you enjoyed my last game, and thanks for publishing it so much which i couldnt have done myself, now nearly everyone in the world has played my game and liked it.This has really lifted me into high spirits, and i am going to make another game, hope you spread that too like wild fire.I know you might have reasons for pirating my game may be because i am not a big game company or may be because you are a worthless stealer, anyways my next game would be priced at same price, so buy it or be a doucebag again.
you pirates might be thinking why am i talking to you so politely, it is because i am a creative person, i like putting my art into games as games are awesome.I make my games in spare time, whenever i get it, and since my spare time resulted in a 9ish metacritic score, it has pumped me up even more, so i might skip some personal time to make next. Even though i earned only $1000 from my previous game, i have no regret as i made it from my existing equipment so zero input except labour(which i dont mind becoz its kinda my hobby).Hoping my next game reaches same success again, may be a big publisher would pick my game and promote it even further ,may be i will earn even more from my next game but you pirates would still be supporting my game by spreading my creation to the world .
I don't get it what You Kreij just said.
But I do hope it is OK if I "enter" without actually entering. i.e. I hope it's OK to write my own just for the sake of it even though I do not qualify.
My Official Entry
First of, I am glad that so many people are enjoying my game. And even more glad that You all love it! Yet, I was getting the official game forum flooded with technical support requests. It appears I left a game-breaking bug in the last boss battle. And I am deeply sorry that this bug is affecting so many people. Truly, having such a horrible game-breaking bug in the release build is unforgivable. Thus, I was trying to help every last one of You, but it appears none of You are installing the patch I released one week ago. This patch, along with fixing many other bugs, also fixes this issue. Since providing an e-mail address is required in order to purchase this game, I used those to send out e-mails with download instructions for all the 511 people who purchased my game. I cannot offer a "public" download link, because I did not get enough income from the sales to host this quite large patch. Thus, I had to personally transfer the patch for every person who bought this game, one way or another (for example using IMs). Still, I find one thing strange to me: I already sent the patch to all the 511 people on the registry who bought the game, yet I get thousands of requests for help of people claiming to have bought it. Since I had to shut down the forums because it exceeded both the storage space and later, the bandwidth limits, I am not sure how many exactly there are of You. Too bad I got all the forum data wiped for not paying up in time, so I cannot track You all down to give patch anymore. Also, I think that the distributor might be ripping me off. There are so many of You who bought the game, yet I got paid for only a little more than half a thousand of You. By getting paid, I actually mean being taken by the distributor. You see - there is an entry fee to have a game distributed. This fee is $5000. At $5 per game before deducing the distributors cut and taxes, I still owe the distributor ~$4000. Until I can sort this issue out, I will not have the resources to re-host the forum. I am also selling my computer (along with many other worthy possessions) to pay off the debt to the distributor, before it starts increasing from a lateness interest. Because of this, with sincerest apologies, I also must announce that I am canceling that free DLC I promised before, along with ceasing support for the game. On a side-note, even though my girlfriend refused to let me move in to live with her now that I can no longer pay the rent for my apartment, along with dumping me, there also are bright things ahead: I have a place to live! My parents agreed to take me in! If other things start going better, as this thing did, I might be able to resume support and development for this game in a few years!
ATTENTION: This site is going down soon! "Soon" means in either 16 hours, when my hosting plan expires OR when it hits the bandwidth limit, whichever comes first.
P.S. I suppose I double-not-qualify. Because I have not addressed pirates there.
I fixed your post.
I feel so stupid now...
has anyone seen my hairbrush? no?
@yogurt_21 I don't get it
@Vinsha : See post #40 too.
Single word bumps are technically against the rules, so we add something stupid.
Thats good to know, I suppose I should now cease and desist now that I see the error of my single word-bumping ways. Are there any other secret rules I should know?
There are no "secret rules" per-se, just rules that are not always enforced with due diligence as we don't like to beat up the general populous in an overly obvious fashion. Single word posts and the likes of "+1" or "subbed" have always been frowned upon as they add no real value to a thread and just tend to make threads longer than they really need to be. One may deem that people use these methods to add to their post count (which may be true), but that is really a personal issue they have that should be taken up with their plastic surgeon as it's more likely they need something more than a higher post count.
This is not a bump, and should be construed as a little helpful insight into the workings of TPU instead of being viewed as a bump. There are obvisouly too many words to qualify it as a bump and to falsely accuse me of bumping my own thread would be rather disingenuous and would be a failure to view the big picture of what we consider bumps.
Nice explanation for the rest of your post, K.
This is my official entry.
Thank you for purchasing* Mailman Trolls the World, an exciting and new side scrolling platform game implementing Brony elements.
We here at Infinity Word decided against using restrictive DRM to show our faithful customers our dedication to bringing high quality content at an attractive, and affordable price.
The game is $5.
There is a demo where you can play the entirety of the first act.
My accounting department (read: mom) tells me that I have sold 200 copies of the game, but my user score submission server reports that well over 7 million unique users have submitted scores! That's amazing!
But that was not the point of the game! A simple Google search for Mailman + Troll would have brought you to a tech website where you would find out that the Mailman is an actual man, who actually enjoys the fine art of trolling.
I approached Mailman about 2 years ago with an idea so awesome, and so epic he stated that it was so full of win that he would participate Pro Bono. The Mailman lent his likeness and used his artistic skills to make a game so entertaining to two people (him and I) that it could be very infamous. The point is in the title of the game.
Mailman Trolls the World is a legitimate gaming experience for anyone who purchases it. It's also a pretty legitimate gaming experience for those who illegally download it. You see, legitimate purchasers get the game, and nothing else!
Pirates get extra!
How is this possible do you ask? Well firstly, Mailman set up a spare machine in his home from which he created a torrent of our complete game and posted it on The Pirate Bay. Included in this torrent is a "CD-Key Crack" which would activate the game on anyone's computer without needing to activate the game over our servers! But wait, didn't you saythe game is DRM free? Yes, yes it is! The full version of the game doesn't require a CD Key or any sort of activation, but the pirated version does.
Upon activation, the bit of code you activated on your computer adds all of your pictures and videos to the torrent client of your choice, and the EULA included with the key crack that you didn't read (because the text was so small) ensures that we can do what we want with your pictures and videos. We like to call this new technology in videogames ULC, or Uploadable Content.
Now that we have had a few months to filter through all of the photos and videos, we took the best of the best and are launching an amateur porn site called Infinity Word Fans Forever! Using the content YOU GAVE TO US! We think we will be able to recoup our losses through advertising dollars.
The game. Mailman Trolls the World.
Yes, Mailman trolls the world.
* By purchasing, we mean totally downloading it illegally.
This thread needs more love.
C'mon, guys, show us Your writing talent! (or the lack of...)
Either way, this thread is roneny and needs Your post. Not just that, but also:
Uncle Sam wants YOU to enter this contest
I know it's terrible.
It's the avatar you've always wanted!
The game you pirated had a hidden DRM. I Now have every JPG file from your computer in my email inbox.
Your sister looks cute.
how did this get hidden back here? if only there was a way to fix that. Hmmm
This contest will close for the US people on 10/20/12 at exactly 10:20:12 pm Central time.
The US winner will be announced shortly after that and will have to answer a simple question (as the rules stated) and also PM me their real name and mailing address.
The winner will not be told what the prize is, and I will leave it up to them whether or not to post what it is after they've received it.
The international people will get more time to jump in or modify their entries because I included them later.
I read that if you put 1000 monkeys on 1000 typewriters and let them type for 1000 years they will randomly produce all the works of Shakespeare.
I'm thinking one drunk monkey, an XBox controller and about 6 months to recreate all the posts on TPU.
Get your entries in while there is still time ....
If you don't want me to starve to death and want a wonderful, mostest awesomest sequel, please buy it! Also if you have no problems shoving $5 footlongs from Subway down your throat, you can buy my game as those subs only last a meager 10 minutes of pleasure while my game last a lot longer (Plus you won't be called fat for eating a Subway, that's right I called you fat for eating a Subway). Without you buying this game, I cannot even afford $5 footlongs from subway... (And I don't eat there cuz I ain't fat)
So yea, buy the game.
In the interest of those involved I would just like to indicate that there are only three days left.
I would love to say there were five days left, or maybe even let my twisted, evil side say there is only one day left, but the fact of the matter is that there are three days left.
Whoo, I'm gonna be in an attic all day wearing a tyvek suit and a respirator...
I Don't understand your reasons for this, but if it's some dress-up-silly-till-contest-ends thing then I shall wear This
Hey, its the 20th! So we may see today who's utterances strike kreijs fancy!
Edit: Im an idiot; Its the 21st!
Separate names with a comma.